Looking up

Last weekend, I was given a pair of sneakers, some sort of Nike, black with red symbols. They're flat underneath, with no heel to speak of, and I was itching to try them out, see if they were good to run in. Today I did...

I'm fairly happy with the way my iaido is going, I've been able to train that thing that feels the most important to me right now, which is zanshin, awareness, and fighting spirit. The technical matters are as they are, I need a lighter sword to become quicker, and there's little to change this close to the National Championships, but I've felt really disconnected, going through the motions. I need some more space than I am sometimes given, need to be able to go inside myself and find what I need to bring out.
I happened to be the one to lead both Monday's and Wednesday's training, which actually was quite beneficial as I could then change them to suit my needs. And, consequently, train the kata I needed, and leave the participants to theirs for a few moments now and then, doing my own thing. One needs a little time without supervision, to figure things out properly, or so I have found. They said they appreciated it, anyway.

Because our trainer in Kali Sikaran was at the Mandirigma Boot Camp in the Phillippines this week, Tuesday saw, well, me, sort of leading the training. But I've had training in suddenly having to do that before - iaido, anyone? I simply gauged the participants, figured one can always, always use a return to the basics, and off we went. It was very cooperational. It became a little more troublesome when more people showed up - at first it was me and the Two Brothers, then a guy who's had to be away for most of last and this term dropped in, and lastly a young woman, freshly committed to Kali Sikaran. So our skill levels were... uneven. But it worked out all right! After a creative and fun warmup, I took the two less experienced through some basics in double baston (double stick), showing them then some simple applications of that without weapons, the young guy joined the Brothers in kicking, punching and takedowns, and me and the young woman (whose name I cannot for the life of me remember, much less spell - I'll get there eventually, I'm just not very good with names) continued with some really basic defense against a straight punch, and later, a left jab, right cross, left hook (a hit that comes slightly from the outside-side of your head), and the "revenge" part of simply ducking underneath the hook, slamming one fist into the stomach of the attacker and then, once past them, slam your hand into their face just to push them away and make them flinch. She caught on really well!
We ended it with a nice and exhausting piece of workout, that certainly let me know I have some nice back muscles these days...

I was very happy to see on Thursday that Theo, the guy holding the Open Training on Saturdays, guest-starred as the trainer. We went through the oh so important basics of double baston; how to hold, how to hit, how to hit the very spot you need to hit - and that, dear readers, is something one needs to work on. There is a technique to it, as there is to everything, and by the end we'd started weaving it all together into a nice whole. We turned to empty-handed applications after that, which were very enlightening! There are so many good defences, and it is very nice to learn them, one after another, until they are completely internalised. However, with only one and a half hour, we didn't really get through all of his planned program, so, yesterday's Open Training included some repetition. And oh, was it good. I enjoyed it thoroughly!

Those two hours might have been some kind of favourite in a long time. Five enthusiastic participants, one enthusiastic trainer, a lot of good new advice and knowledge, some positively humiliating takedowns, some really good tricks... it was great. My shoulders, and my throat muscles, are sore already (it usually takes a little more than just one day for them to start whining about having been used), despite the precautions I took! I love it, of course.
I had a friend along (let's call him Jax), who's trained karate, kick-boxing and other things, and is a devil at kicking, whether it be standing on the ground or flying through the air. He's dedicated to climbing now, and thus has excellent shoulder and core muscles - gratifying to work with, as there is less danger of hurting him. I've seldom had such a fun and excellent partner to work with for two hours straight. We could help eachother, and thank the powers that be for that! My kicks are absolute rubbish, even if I have the strength, but they are his forte. On the other hand, he's not too used to going in close, whether with attack or defence, but I've become quite familiar with that. So, a lot of fun was had! And I love "fighting" with my friends. Seldom do you see their true nature as then, and seldom can you behave like a young, overenergetic fox pup and still get out of it with a smile, a few bruises and no hard feelings.
It was rounded off with a few minutes of sparring, which was absolutely brilliant. Knife fighting, and finally me and Jax had the chance I've sort of been itching for for years! First round I won decisively, sneaking in under his arm and cutting him across his torso. Second round was quite even, and a lot of fun. No one really won, but no one really lost.
So we're both kind of hoping this'll be a recurring event! We had an after-training cup of tea/coffee, which is always great. When it was time to part, most of my mad energy (that always turns up after training) had begun to dissipate, and even though I was determined at first to take a little run when I got home, I eventually just dove into bed and slept for about ten hours. Not straight, I woke up now and then, but, more or less.

It might have something to do with being social, being out amongst people for two days in a row (had to get some art supplies on Friday and therefore had to brave the crowds), and training with great enthusiasm for two hours...

Today, the sun was out from early morning, and I felt the familiar itch in my whole body. I needed to run...
The problem was, I'm a bit hesitant to get out twice in a day (social anxiety and all that), and I did need groceries. I also did not want to waste time. Of course, I eventually wound up getting my trousers on, my new jogging shoes, put in a pair of in-soles that, to my great relief, works perfectly, pulled on my long-sleeved training shirt and grabbed my rucksack and went out. I took a detour, of course, running on the fields behind the house, and only a small distance on asphalt. Bought what I needed, stowed it in the bag, and took a longer detour back, on my favourite gravel and dust road. I ran a wee bit longer than strictly needed to get back home, but, turned as soon as I started feeling fatigue in my legs. I need to be careful, as I've said, now that I'm starting up this running thing again!

The first run in the "new" shoes turned out quite fine. They don't sit as snugly around the foot as I am used to, and their opening is wider than usual for me too. However, I can get used to that. It was nice that they were completely flat, and they gave me a little dampening but not the Mega Über New Technology sort that I really, really can do without... just enough that I can run on unpaved roads. So my running outfit is now complete: long-sleeved Nike training shirt that looks as new from a theatre sale, (probably fake) Adidas used trousers bought from an eBay-spinoff (not really worth the money, but that's auctions for you, and it's all made up by the other parts costing next to nothing) and used shoes. Not a new item in sight, except underwear and socks. I like it that way. Why ditch something that's perfectly useful? I wouldn't use the shoes if they'd been well-walked in, I'm aware of the danger in that, but, they aren't, so, I use them. Carefully, of course, but they do work.

My body is responding well, the shoulder is still painful but seems to like the varied training it is getting these days, and I had a long, admiring look at the lovely muscles on my legs the other day. Really, do take that time to look at yourself and admire all those bodyparts that are so strong, so gorgeous, that carry you through everyday life, trainings and pastimes! Not only are they gorgeous in themselves, but they are strong, and healthy, because you use them!

Yah, spring is here, training's looking up, my goal is now set to be at least a small run every day (ten to fifteen minutes will be quite all right for most days, though Fridays and Sundays might see me run longer) before next winter, and the National Championships is in two weeks time...
How are you doing, readers? Any new goals? Any new equipment to be fond of?

The importance of motivation

I have been meaning to speak about motivation, and I will do it now. I am not the best to do so - I have always h ad a more than a little stubborn streak, a willpower that could shatter granite or even diamond and an annoying habit of going through with things I have decided upon. However, I am also adept at simply not doing other things. It often comes down to motivation. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, it is a noun, and "the reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way", including "the general desire or willingness of someone to do something". It can thus be why we do what we do, or how much we want to do something. I have always wanted to be able to run. Why, I do not know. Possibly from seeing mother tear her way through competitions for the sheer fun of it, when young. Or possibly because I couldn't, after around eleven years of age. Or because I had, and loved it, and wanted to again. I have wanted to get rid of pain (knees, shoulder, back...). But I went to doctors and specialists alike, and seldom got a very good reception, until one lady finally began, well, listening. Not just hear what I said, but listen to it, too. However, even before that, I had found a prime motivator for myself: Whatever I did that caused my health to be on top, it helped my iaido, my martial art. That seemed to be the key. I could never do all those boring exercises I was supposed to waste half an hour on every day, and so on. I have always had a lot to do, simply because I can, and I enjoy it. And enjoy sometimes painful, often exhausting and boring, and definitely repetitive, exercises designed sorely to "make the muscles in my legs steady the knees", well... it wasn't a motivator that helped me. It did nothing, no matter the pain. I have to go roundabout ways to get motivation, or get motivated, or to do things. But like I said, my mind is strong, and the device "mind over matter" has nearly always helped me. When it doesn't, that's when I fall into deep pits of despari, but let's talk about that some other time. Now, I started doing iaido in... uh... 200...4? I think? That should be it. It was clear from the start I had to do the sitting kata standing up. No kneepads I could borrow or buy helped that. Until 2005, in autumn, after I had lived in Japan and been ordered to come back and grade for shodan (first dan) in November. I had to get something for my knees. And I went to a specialised company selling stuff to amongst other professionals, militaries, and so on, and there, I found Arc'teryx's kneepads with a thin, hard, plastic part on the outside, and soft cushioning on the inside. They had adjustable straps and, I bought them and thought it worth it, when three weeks later, I had learned to do the kata sitting down, and taken my shodan. I have used them since. Sure, I may look odd compared to everyone else, but they make it work. And once I had those, I could start on more complicated stuff. The koryu kata that are practically all from a sitting position didn't hurt in the bad way, they suddenly... made the pain go away. Unknowingly, I was strengthening all those muscles all the therapists had been trying to telling me to. But I was doing it on my own accord, and for my own reasons: my way in life, that is, iaido. It is not simply something like going to the gym. It is a "do", a way, of living, not just physical exercises. In short, I need something more than a mere "do this and everything will be fine, or at least better". And I needed the honesty, a few years later, of someone saying "you have accepted that you will never get perfectly well, but you are willing to make an effort to become as good as you can, and that is good" (thank you, Anna-Karin at Bosön). I have had many different motivations throughout the years. My mind is my strong point. I have used imagination, down to writing myself a message "to be taken to the elf king beyond the valley, by fastest runner - go!" in order to run (of course, this was back when I ran "normally" and though I certainly did it, I still found it a struggle and stopped), or putting myself in an imaginary Japan, with a whole other name, in a dojo, training as one of the warriors of the clan, in order to be well defended against outsiders. Yes, I use fantasy, and I use my own imagination, and if I find something strong enough, it works. When I was young, I used the motto that if I wanted to be an elf, I had to BE one. Run, jump, train, exert myself! So I went from being unwilling in the PE classes, to being quiet, and very, very hard-working. I hated the others there, but I did everything and I did it well, and it showed. And it felt good, because I knew that I had to be the best, or I wouldn't be an elf. Because an elf is better than a human, right? For running, I used the motto "what if...?" What if this works, running barefoot style? What if it will help me run again? And I used the will from way back when to actually run, the one I had, lamenting, put into a small mental box and mourned and given up. Some use winning as a motivation. Being the best, beating everyone else, can give you an immense satisfaction, and a boost to your self-esteem. Now, I think you should be able to boost your self-esteem all by yourself, and not depend on others for it (and certainly not do it by somehow diminishing others, or hurt them, or cause yourself to feel "higher" than them by making them "lower"), but we are talking motivation here - whatever works for you! (Almost whatever, anyway). Some use getting faster, stronger, harder. Running longer, or the same distance but quicker. This can be a very powerful motivator for some, but I think its importance and strength has been exaggerated. Especially in school, we tend to see this almost everywhere, and fail to realise, there are other ways of motivating people to get better. Some need some goal, such as loosing a specific amount of weight (muscles weigh more than fat, mind you) or being able to, like above, run a set length for a set time, or somesuch. Some need something less tangible - like me, where I need somehow to be able to relate everything back to my iaido. Whatever I do that might even remotely benefit that, is automatically easier to do, or, gets done at all. Or I must have some fantasy in my head to follow, but then, I live a lot inside my head anyway so that might not be good for everyone. And some do not need A to have a result or worth of B. For some, the sheer joy, or the doing itself, is the motivation. A modified quote from one book by Charles de Lint is "It is the doing, not the done" ("Yarrow" by Charles de Lint). Some need others to keep tabs on them, since they "cheat" if they are the only ones involved. Some use treats for motivation - a chocolate praline, a new pair of shoes, going out to dinner, taking a trip, having a bath, buying something they've wanted for some time or whatever the case may be. Others use the opposite - threats - for motivation. "If I don't do this, then that will happen/be my punishment." This works for some, but I prefer positive motivational force. Some people are stuck in trying to motivate themselves in one way. We change over time, no matter how long we live or what we do, and therefore, I would advice to occasionally try out another way of motivating yourself. Try keeping it positive, encouraging and, well, motivational. If it's a chore, it's not motivation. Find what works, think your life through. And do not shy away from unpleasant realisations or hard decisions, questions and suchlike. Motivation is a powerful force, so use it as such. Combine many ways, or use only one. What are your thoughts on motivation? What is your personal way of being/becoming motivated, or for motivating yourself or others? Do you have some example of what has worked, and what has not worked?

Forest jaunt with nice company

I have found that, since a few years, the worst of my muscle pains comes not the day after, but about one and a half day after. However, this time it was because I forgot to shower in cold water right after iaido. That helps to get the blood to carry away the leftovers from the muscles, which helps to avoid muscle pains.

Today, thus, was consequently a day of feeling a bit stiff and rather pleased with myself that I did. Eating got a bit jumbled, with breakfast being lunch; that is, late, and dinner therefore came early. After that it was time for a jaunt out in the forest. I had company, who is rather unfit (but working on it; has strength but not yet stamina, since it's not been too long since said person finally got the right cockatil of medicines to combat their asthma), so I was literally jogging in circles a lot of the time, doubling back along forest trails. We started out with the asphalt road before heading up into the quarry and the forest. All in all it was about forty minutes of running, perhaps fifty, with a few minor pauses for walking here or there where the trail was too tricky. Afterwards I did a rather short and easy set of crunches, core, back and shoulder excercises, and then, stretching. And showering in cold water (well, at first, then I had some that was a bit warmer).
It was particularily nice having someone to occasionally chat to, and to help said person keep going and not stopping, as is so easy to do when one despairs of ever getting some kind of constitution back!

My left knee was beginning to act up about thirty minutes into the jaunt, so I walked downhill (it's a rather long and uneven stretch) and took it easy for a couple of minutes, until I could jog on flat ground again. It doesn't hurt very bad, but as I have said - I am going to take it easy for quite a while so as not to sink this ship before it's left port. It's been many many years since I could run fast and far.

As to the blog name, "Fleet feet, pointy ears", it partly has a nice ring to it and of course also stuff behind it. I feel so joyous being able to run again, and I don't run with a thumping motion, but even when running quite slow, I seem to float along, looking quite fleet despite the speed. And, of course, if you look at the famous works of the nowadays well-known John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, the elves there are known for running fast and far and light. They even walk on top of snow - something which caused me great joy when a decade ago I saw the movie version of "The Fellowship of the Ring", that they had incorporated. Note how the character of Legolas runs in those movies - lightly, on the balls of his feet rather than heavily and lumbering on his heels! So, like an elf with pointy ears, I run, and I run best when I am in a forest on a winding path.

Perhaps on Sunday I will tell you a bit more about why I am so careful about starting out slow, and why I couldn't run for so very long. Until then, run easy, run smooth, run careful and run joyful!